what was that? is that all there is? who is this? this is it.

sitting down I feel like stopping

that’s the sound of tall cans popping

the economy, it’s not slowing

that disparity          is growing

I cannot bust out cheesy rhyming couplets like this without evoking the psychedelic paddle boat trip through the tunnel where Willy Wonka loses his shit and the kids are trying to keep it together for an everlasting gobstopper…

There's no earthly way of knowing

Which direction we are going

There's no knowing where we're rowing

Or which way the river's flowing

Is it raining, is it snowing

Is a hurricane a–blowing

Not a speck of light is showing

So the danger must be growing

Are the fires of Hell a–glowing

Is the grisly reaper mowing

Yes, the danger must be growing

For the rowers keep on rowing

And they're certainly not showing

Any signs that they are slowing.

–Roald Dahl

Dahl wrote some crazy stuff that was not for kids. And some of his stuff for kids was not really for kids. 

“the snozberries taste like snozberries”

3 Comments

is that a real beer "cozzie" ornsome invented tree thing influenced by snozberries?

that's a real DANK-made coozie featuring a UW sports medicine patch

The patch is definitely not created by Cory—it is definitely created by a very sad person and I hope they are working right this minute on a revision.

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