a quality of life issue

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urban renewal

June 23, 2017

I found a zip tie with a tree root growing through it.          what are you looking at? what are you worried about? who are you following? who are you retweeting? what's important? what matters? what's the difference? how many likes? how many comments? how much horseshit?

 

I saw a kitten squashed in the street

I read about a plastic surgeon and his art collection

--Iggy Pop


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can't you smell that smell

June 19, 2017

for real really

June 19, 2017

this from AT is not some slick neoretro knockoff

it's the real deal and for me it's all about the package not the product

sincerely for real   really


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tinfoil caps not hats

June 15, 2017

that's what they want you to think

don't ask questions 

 

here's to riding in the rain with no fenders

intentionally    on purpose    mindfully 

leaving steaming wet ass prints on bar stools along the way

 

91 degrees and raining in the 50112

56 degrees and raining in the 98118

 

is it raining? 

 

 


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Volunteer Park Crit turns 50

June 12, 2017

 

 

junior junior and junior didn't care much for the bike races yesterday they were more interested in baby ducks and shaved ice and monkey bars but when things turn 50 it's time to take a little look back 

 

circa 2008 we made a stop at the HopVine during the races punctuating a full day of sitting in the grass drinking can after can of beer.   now there's a beer garden right at the finish line selling $7 cups of beer. 


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what's up Swisher fans?

June 10, 2017

once you notice them

you can't unnotice them

they're   there

they're everywhere

 


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uniform spoke tension

June 7, 2017

serving suggestion enlarged to show texture

 

those wheels are so 6 years ago just like the photo bro

but you can still get your hands on a pair for only $3025.15

i'm not sure if they age well perhaps if you keep them out of direct sunlight and maybe nobody really knows how well they age because they're only 6 years old??? the aerospace industry knows a little bit about a little adhesive used to bond chunks of  carbon fiber to other chunks of carbon fiber over and over and over


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dude ascending a staircase

June 3, 2017

 

a journey of 408 miles begins with a single step

these elevation profiles look pretty impressive

but it all depends on how the data is presented

using the same scale I'd like to present a ride to Columbia City, Beacon Hill, Georgetown, Downtown, Capitol Hill and back to Rainier Beach and I could probably ask somebody under 40 to set that up and graph it neatly for me even though google is already tracking all that and more on each of us and saving it all on a server farm somewhere near Moses Lake but we don't have access to it at this time. 


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do it right

May 31, 2017

one day about 18 years ago I bought one of these shirts at a little shop near 6th & Denny that sold vintage posters and t-shirts before eBay made actual stores obsolete I didn't wear that shirt much becasue I thought it was ugly but I kinda wish I still had it as I will not be purchasing another one for $125


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"Get in the Drops!"

May 31, 2017

one of these kids is doing his own thing

a couple days before 9-11 we'll call it nine-nine of whatever year that was I thought you said you'd never forget I went to Marymoor and took the little class they said you had to take to ride bikes in the velodrome and I went through the motions and followed directions which always seemed to be yelled at me to get in the drops because I was on the tops or where the hoods would be if there were hoods because I've never felt the need to get aero bro so drop bars have sort of dropped out of my lineup but the last 4 times I rode RAGBRAI there were drops on the RB-1 there are lots of pros and some cons to them there handlebars and I often catch myself wanting to yell at everyday commuters to Get in the Drops!

 

zoom in and see that sticker a la Chris Murray pasted on the bike rack RAGBRAI style here in the 98118 and then see the reflectors a la Travis K a la the first thing you take off your new bike when you're a kid but when you get to be my age in the 98118 you find creative ways to put them back on 


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ask me about the dependability bonus

May 29, 2017

ask me about compulsive punctuality

traffic's a real bear

mirror check

signal

head check 

lane change

or      change lanes whenever where ever whatever

those lines on the street are serving suggestions

can't we all get along

look at all those sharrows

multitasking is half assing

it's not the rumble strips in the road that'll fuck you up it's the over reaction stress freak outs in the crowd that stack it up white knuckle like lock up

it's not the issue

it's your reaction to the issue      

that    is the issue

it's a quality of life issue

it's a question a child might ask but not a childish question

"Alexa, how the fuck did I get here?" 

in the northern hemisphere my chapstick rolls itself up in my right pocket but not in my left

I want people that drive like assholes to wait longer at the next red light to slam on their brakes to avoid the car in front of them to spill their coffee in their lap to get a big dry mouthful of karma dust or something like that


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pill identifier

May 24, 2017

day in day out. intense RAGBRAI training continues. 


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98118 - maillot jaune - 50112

May 22, 2017

behind blue eyes 2.0

May 19, 2017

product placement

May 19, 2017

as President Emeritus and founder of the Profile Design Cup Holders Club this would be featured on my twitter instagram horseshit to fulfill my contract agreements to place the product prominently 17 or more times per month if I had a contract or any kind of sponsorship...but in fact I have one or two of these cages on all of my bikes because they hold a cup of coffee as well as a tallboy as well as a roadmaster as well as an actual water bottle and it's not because I'm talking the talk it's because I'm walking the walk slowly up hill both ways


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so six years ago

May 16, 2017

The passage of time personified. A little living breathing calendar that only gets bigger.   A kid that is. All up in your face they just keep growing. For me ages 22-42 were kind of a blur on the north end of the I-5 corridor a gelatinous mass of memories low level jobs housemates studio apartments and singlespeed conversions. Then a kid came along and showed me the way time passes differently. Relativity in rain boots. Look away for a day and they’ve grown some more.

 

I know that kid. Six years ago he was in kindergarten. Six years from now he’ll be in college

 

PS    check out that bike

 


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if I had a hammer

May 14, 2017

Pushing my bike up the hill in the 98118 single speededly because I’m in no hurry because I’m not too proud to walk because paper-boying a hill just to avoid walking is so so so much more than six years ago     came upon this sign in the grass   took a photo    sent this text to SteveG “can’t decide if I should text a photo or just steal the fucking sign” then 25 feet later came upon another sign and that one ended up in my bag for the ride home    taken out of context and put back in     the right tool for the job     you can order any foo foo espresso drink you want as long as it’s a hammer

 


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focal point

May 13, 2017

you can't get there from here

May 11, 2017

I haven’t put on an alley cat race for 18 years but if I did one today it would include this stop - South Spokane Street at Hahn Place South - the checkpoint to fuck up all checkpoints. Route yourself accordingly. There will be no smartphones, no GPS, no Strava. Good old fashioned paper maps are OK and hard-earned experience and knowledge of local geography are even better. Google maps can’t solve all your problems and the satellite images don’t clue you in on secret stairways and handy elevators.

 

I haven’t registered a domain name for a website in 13 years but if I did one today I hope it wouldn’t take 10 days for the customer service reps to figure it out. This site was suspended for a while because the domain name needed ICANN certification and I guess they warned me of the approaching deadline by emailing dickstank@aol.com which made me laugh almost as much as hearing a customer service rep say “dickstank at AOL dot com” in a polite British accent. dickstank?  AOL? What year is this? How did I get here? As far as I can tell ICANN is just some dude in sweatpants watching Sportscenter and eating pizza pockets while the money rolls in. certification my ass but I do appreciate the emails and texts from the 5 people that noticed the site disappeared

 

I haven’t been a first-day-on-the-job-rookie bike messenger for exactly 20 years but if I was one today I’d probably be overthinking my wardrobe choices and I'd definitely not be drinking enough water

 

you can't get here from there

or maybe you can

all roads lead from Spokane

 

 


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phantom nostalgia syndrome XVII

April 28, 2017

swap out proper nouns repeat as needed

 

that neighborhood was great before they moved in

that bike shop was cool when so and so worked there

that block was walkable when it was single family homes

they were great before they signed with major label 

a good cup of coffee was not $4.50

studio apartments were less than $350

bike messengers delivered VHS tapes

bike messengers delivered blue prints

bike messengers delivered depositions

whatever the question

threadless stem adaptors are not the answer

 

 

 


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